"Your time is limited so don't waste it living someone else's life.
Don't be trapped by Dogma which is living with the results of other people's thinking.
Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your inner voice.
And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition, they somehow already know what you truly want to become."
- Steve Jobs

Monday, November 21, 2011

A letter and a plea to Tamara Ecclestone.

Dear Tamara

I feel compelled to write you this little note after watching all three episodes of your reality TV show.

Firstly, I'd like to make it clear that I understand that everyone is free to choose the way they want to live their life and how they want to spend their money, OK?  So all the haters, don't start with me..........This blog is just my opinion and I am only responsible for what I say, NOT what you understand.

You said that you want the public to understand who you are and that you feel you have been misrepresented in the media as a "vacuous, boring rich girl".  You seem to want validation, understanding, acceptance and approval/admiration for the life you lead.

My ultimate conclusion is that you could be one of the world's greatest philanthropic women if you chose to be.  If you truly have unlimited access to your father's fortune, you can make a difference to so many lives all over the world, and at the same time you would be educating yourself about the state of our world today and meeting a huge variety of interesting people who would be a big step up from some of the vacuous celebrity-loving fake people that share the same bubble as you.

Take 15 minutes to watch this talk given by Zainab Salbi, http://www.ted.com/talks/zainab_salbi.html - or this talk here http://www.ted.com/talks/charity_tilleman_dick_singing_after_a_double_lung_transplant.html THESE are truly inspirational woman that deserves to be admired, respected, and looked up to.  They also deserve to have cameras follow their lives SO MUCH MORE than you do. 

While I'm not suggesting you personally should start going into war zones and fighting for women's rights, your father's massive wealth in your hands can support and help people and organisations like this, and you would learn so much about the human spirit, the fight for survival, equality, and happiness alongside incredible inner strength and determination. 

You can choose one or many organisations to help out.  Marine conservation, kids charities, AIDS, female victimisation in the Congo, regeneration of inner city youth projects....the list is endless.  There are so many problems in the world crying out for the sort of money you have access to.  And you could be right in there with them learning so much as you helped finance their endeavours.  Lots of travel, seeing the world, but seeing it from a hugely different perspective than your gilded, insulated life currently gives you.  Please also note I would expect you to take an active part, and not just hire someone to dish out the money and do all the legwork while you simply turn up for the odd photoshoot.  If you want respect and admiration, you know you have to work for it, girl.

I can see you sticking your chin out now and reminding me of your GOSH fundraiser in episode 2 that raised £600,000.  Yes I remember that, but that achievement was somewhat swept away when you spent £300,000 hiring a super yacht for your next holiday, £10,000 on the private jet, £2,700 on bikinis, and then your brother in law spending an eye-watering 60,000 Euros on champagne while your boyfriend gambled huge amounts of money on backgammon.  I'd love to know the final bill for that holiday......And none of this expense seemed to even register on your radar as jaw-droppingly "O-M-G Holy shit did she just spend that???".  I mean, why didn't you just write a cheque for GOSH and not bother with all the hoo-hah of the fundraising evening?  Because in some ways, the exposure and the hoo-hah of that evening was your key to "validation and approval".

But I can sort of understand this lack of awareness if that's the only life you know and the only way of living you've been exposed to.  I know little about your youth and whether your mum took you out into "the real world" to see how the rest of us live, and whether she showed you how some people struggle.  If she never did this then you can't be blamed for having no understanding and perspective of your life compared to ours.  Seeing how "the other half live" on TV is no substitute for getting down and dirty amongst us and REALLY experiencing it.

To quote Grace Dent's TV review in the Guardian "Tamara, due to an accident of birth, has been starved of any meaningful skillset for class empathy."

I don't mention your dad in your upbringing as I get the impression he was rarely around, an explanation for the distant relationship you now share and which you desperately want to change.  I'd love to know what he thinks of your documentary and why he seems happy to give you unlimited access to his money yet restrict your access to him as a father. 

I can see that you have a big heart, as evident in the toy spending spree for GOSH.  I personally would love to spend like that and to see the smiles on people's faces in return, it's a reward that no amount of wealth and magazine spreads can ever match up to.

I would like to set you a challenge for 2012.  Meet with some new charities, set yourself a budget, ask to get your hands dirty, ask to be exposed to the harsh realities of their world, and ask to be a student - a blank slate to be filled with true life experiences that will change you inside forever.  Then open your mind, leave the false eyelashes and £60k bottles of champagne behind, step away from the cameras, and do some proper work.  In my view there is no other way for you to gain the respect you want.

Of course, while you are globetrotting and doing all this good I'd be happy to look after that black Ferrari for you...... :o)

All the best.